Just Give Me a Reason
by brianne1357
Summary: Holly Oswald has come back to Charming. She wants to avoid SAMCRO and everything that comes with them. What happens when she unknowingly falls for one of the son's prominent members. Does she give up on love to avoid the group or does she embrace everything shes been running from since leaving Charming and the one son who broke her heart before.
1. Break Down Here

I couldn't help but groan as I stepped foot out of the car and touched down on the old familiar pavement. It had been a very long time since I had been back to my home town. I hated the thought of being back, but the phone call I had received the previous morning confirmed my worst fears causing me to drop everything and get back to town to see my sister. I had grown up in Charming, finally leaving as soon as I turned eighteen. I had seen what happened to the kids I had grown up with. More then a few of them were now working full time in the town lumber yard or the local shit hole restaurants. I had seen close friends turn to the towns growing escort businesses and some even belonged SAMCRO the notorious biker gang. If I had of stayed here I would have been just another one of them most likely working for my father, or getting pregnant early on but I wanted more then that. I wanted more then what Charming could give me.

I quickly shut the car door behind me and rushed up the familiar steps of the local hospital. I pushed through the heavy doors trying to remain patient but I couldn't help but find myself snapping at the young girl behind the counter. "Tristen Oswald's room please" I blurted out leaning against the counter. I couldn't help but tap my feet against the marble floor, a nervous habit I had picked up years ago as I waited for any kind of response. "Miss I'm sorry I cant give out that information" she said quietly, "I'm her sister I can show you my id" I was quick to snap back. "I'm sorry I still can not give out that information. The police are not allowing her to have any visitors just yet, its the parents request." the girl said before turning her attention to a file in front of her. "Fine" I managed to say before turning and heading down the long hallway. I had no idea why my sister was in this hospital, my parents had called me with a message that Tristen had been in an accident but she was okay. What the fuck had happened to cause the police to be involved. I quickly rushed through the crowded hallway, determined now to find her room myself. I turned the corner just in time to see a familiar face speaking with my very tired looking father.

I held back, trying to see exactly why the Son and my dad looking deep in conversation, his mother Gemma standing not far behind them. I held my breath, nervous now watching as Jax Teller took off into the nearby maternity wing leaving my dad standing there alone now. I rushed over to him hoping to avoid the glare of the son as I stood in the same spot they had been moments before. "Dad" I blurted out as I felt his arms wrap around me pulling me into a deep hug as I felt his lips quickly touch my cheek "Holly, thank god your here. Your mother and sister will be so happy to see you" he said now sounding more exhausted then he looked. "Dad what is going on? why were you talking to Jax Teller?" "Hunny, it's okay Jax is just going to help me out don't worry about that. I want you to see your sister she needs you" he said quickly brushing off my request for more info on why he was was with the vp of the Sons. "What happened to her why is she here?" "Holly," he started off grabbing my hands telling me this was more serious then I had first imagined. "We were at Fun Town. We left her for five minutes, she was supposed to be waiting for us but we couldn't find her. She was attacked Holly, some ass hole dressed as a fucking clown took her into the woods and raped her" he said chocking on the last words.

It quickly hit me at once. My thirteen year old sister was stuck in this hospital because someone attacked her, how was she going to recover from this? and how was it going to change the sister I had seen grow into an amazing young girl. "Holly? are you okay?" I heard my fathers voice. "Yeah one second, I just need to catch my breath. I will be back I just need a minute. Don't tell her I'm here yet I want to surprise her" I said quickly before pushing away from him basically running down the hall. I hated feeling this way, selfishly taking time for myself instead of being in there with her holding her and trying to make sense of this. I sighed as I felt the cold fall air hit my cheeks. I tucked myself close to a nearby wall quickly pulling a cigarette from my purse and slipped it between my lips, just as this feeling got the best of me and tears quickly began pouring down my cheek. I dropped the cigarette and sunk down the wall burying my face in my hands as I cried hard, not knowing what to do next.

I couldn't help but feel guilty knowing if I hadn't left Charming so quickly I would have been with them that day. How was I possibly supposed to comfort her. My thoughts were interrupted when I heard an unfamiliar voice "Hey you okay?". I looked up to see a young guy with a mohawk and tattoos covering each bald section of his head. He was wearing a dark blue hoodie, he was cute I couldn't help but admit it but now was not the time for me to be flirting with random guys. "Yeah thanks, just a rough day I just wanted to come have a smoke before I go back in" I said embarrassed now as I quickly wiped the tears from my cheeks with the sleeve of my sweater. "Here" he said holding his hand out, without thinking I accepted slipping my hand into his as he pulled me off the ground. "Thanks" I said hoping I had another cigarette and the one I had dropped a moment ago wasn't the last one, I usually only smoked when I was stressed causing me to carry less then a pack at a time. "Dammit" I muttered under my breath as I found the empty pack in my purse confirming my fear. "Here, take one" he offered as he held out a full pack. "Thanks" I said slowly slipping one out of the pack and holding it between my fingers as he held out a lighter quickly touching the flame to the end.

I silently slipped the small cigarette between my lips sighing as I took a deep breath in before exhaling the dark smoke, feeling slightly relaxed as I felt the familiar sensation slip down my throat. "So are you here for family to?" I asked trying to make some conversation with the polite stranger, "No I was just dropping off the bosses wife some things her daughter in law and grandson are in here". "Oh well good for you, avoiding this place is smart. Anyways thanks for the cigarette I really needed it. Whats your name?" I asked as I quickly took a few more long puffs before dropping the cigarette knowing I needed to get in there and finally face my little sister. "No problem anytime, cant see a pretty girl out here crying without offering a little relief and it's Juice" he said with a wink and a gorgeous smile. I couldn't help but laugh feeling relieved again "Well it's nice to meet you Juice. Hopefully I will see you around" I said with a wink before I took off back into the towns old hospital, convinced I heard the sound of a motorcycle starting up.


	2. Famous In a Small Town

It had been a day since the incident with Tristen, she had been assuring me she was fine but I wasn't ready to leave Charming just yet. I had slept in the hospital room with her over night and now that it was late in the morning I had officially spent more then a few hours laying next to her in bed reading articles from seventeen magazine out loud to her as she painted her nails. I had just finished reading her one about her favourite bad when she looked up at me.

"Can we get some ice cream?" she asked with that same smile I had seen so many times before. I couldn't help but smile back before I was able to answer my silent mother in the corner was quick to speak up "Tristen were going home in a few hours you can wait until then"

"Ill be right back sweetie" I kissed the top of her head before jumping off the bed. "Mom I will be back, I am getting Tristen some ice cream" I said before quickly leaving before she could bring up some argument in front of Tristen saying something about either her not needing to gain weight or trying to hid in the room so god forbid anyone from Charming knew her daughter was the one hidden inside the room with police outside the door.

I shut the door behind me and took off down the hallway. I had just burst through the same hospital doors I had gone in the night before when I almost ran straight into Tara Knowles. I had known Tara since high school, we had been best friends growing up. We had grown up as girls, and ended up going through all our rebellious stages in high school. We had ended up growing apart when she left town to go to school and I had followed my supposed to be rockstar boyfriend to Italy.

"Tara, wow how are you?" I asked pulling my friend into a deep hug.

"Holly hey, I'm good. Obviously I'm back in Charming, which you know wasn't exactly planned but its been good. I'm back at my parents house, I've been cleaning out the place and eventually when everything is settled I'm going to look into some different residences. What about you what are you doing back here? I thought you were in Italy" she asked pulling back from the hug.

"I'm hoping I'm only here for a few days. My sister she was the one in that accident yesterday I came back into town to spend some time with here" I admitted hating that this awful thing that my sister had gone through was the only thing that had brought me back to this town.

"Aw Holly I'm sorry Jax mentioned that I didn't know it was your sister. If it helps I over heard them mention that SAMCRO was going to look into it" she said sounding sincerely sorry about the incident.

"I was hoping to avoid that. Don't get me wrong I don't mind Jax he was always a good guy but I was afraid my dad had gone to them. I would prefer SAMCRO have nothing to do with this but I'm leaving in a few days so I guess what happens happens. Anyways hun I am so sorry to run but Tristen gets out in a bit and I promised I would bring her back some ice cream so I've got to run but it would be nice to get together before I leave town." I said feeling frustrated at the face that Tara had convinced me my fears were true. That was all my father needed, the guilt of what had happened to his daughter was clearly getting to him and now he was going to end up owing SAMCRO a favour.

"Of course go I totally understand. Yeah give me a call we will meet up. I'll see you later let me know if you guys need anything I'm on the third floor you can have me paged" she called over her shoulder before heading back into the hospital.

I quickly crossed the street and headed into the nearby convince store. I walked through the aisle grabbing a few things tossing them into the basket I grabbed at the door. I stopped for a moment flipping through a pile of teenage magazines trying to find a few that Tristen would like when I heard that same voice behind me.

"Funny running into you again". I turned just in time to see him flash that same gorgeous smile from the night before. "Yeah, small world I guess" I said returning my attention back to the magazine in front of me trying to avoid the temptation to flirt with the complete stranger.

"It's Holly isn't it?" I heard his voice again.

"Yes, it's Juice right?" I replied back with a smirk and a raised eyebrow.

"Im impressed you didn't forget. Are you staying in town for a bit?" he asked as he leaned against the wall beside me. A simple move that seemed to show off just how fit the stranger was.

"I'm not sure maybe. At lest another day or so. Why are you asking?" I mentioned now slightly intrigued with the handsome stranger. I couldn't help but be interested in where this conversation was going.

"Just wondering. Maybe if your not busy we can hang out, you know we can catch a drink tonight or mini golf whatever your into you know" he offered with another gorgeous smirk before he winked quickly.

"I probably would but I'm only in town for a day or two so maybe I can get a rain check. Nice to meet you though" I said before turning and heading towards the cashier before I dumped my now full basket on the cashier. Before I realized he was behind me I began to dig through my purse searching for my visa as I heard his voice again. I turned just in time to see Juice hand over the cashier a bill and take back the change from the cashier as he slipped the items in a bag.

"Wow you did not have to do that" I said stepping back from the counter as I watched Juice grab the bag and head towards the door.

"I know I didn't need to do it. Listen I don't want to get depressing but I heard what happened to your sister. That is a shit situation and I'm sorry let me do this for you and maybe you can pay me back by agreeing to that date" he said with a wink as he held open the door for me.

I hated that he did that simple gesture that was so sweet, which instantly made me hate myself for turning down his date request earlier. I walked beside him silently for a moment as we walked across the street together before eventually reaching the front of the hospital.

"One date, tomorrow night. Eight o'clock pick me up at the coffee shop down the street" I said before turning back and heading for the front doors of the hospital before I actually thought and changed my mind.

"See you then gorgeous" I heard him call out from behind me.

"Remember, hoodies are not the best look for a date" I called out with a smirk before heading back into the hospital.


	3. Pay Phone

I couldn't help but sigh as I walked down the streets of down town Charming. I felt physically exhausted as I slowly made my way closer to the hotel I had been staying in. It had been two days since Tristan's incident but I couldn't bring myself to leave just yet. Thankfully she was home now and would soon be going back to school. Even though her life was slowly getting back to normal, even my father seemed slightly relieved I couldn't bring myself to make any plans to leave Charming just yet. I was just about to step foot towards the hotel when I heard a voice from behind me.

"Holly, hey" the voice was deep and slightly familiar.

I turned just in time to see Jax Teller headed in my direction. I had known Jax since we were young kids. I had always liked the guy, he seemed to have a good head on his shoulders. That was until he had followed in his fathers footsteps and joined SAMCRO. I had stayed friends with him because of Tara, but after watching their relationship go from one extreme to the next I had secretly being very happy when she had ended it moving far from Charming. I wanted the best for my friend and it was obvious as sweet as Jax could be he wasn't about to leave their small town anytime soon.

"Hey Jax, it's been a long time"

"Yeah it has, I thought you had escaped this place" he said with a quick wink as he pulled me into a familiar hug. I hated to admit that it only took one smile from the biker to remind me just how his charm could instantly drop any fake attitude I was throwing up.

"Oh you know everyone comes back eventually. I've already run into Tara at the hospital.I think I'm only going to be here for a few days though. I came back just to check up on my sister."

"Yeah I'm really sorry to hear about that. How is your sister doing now?" he asked with a raised eyebrow and a general look of concern ran across his face. I couldn't help but admit that I quickly began to feel bad for still holding such a grudge against Jax, maybe he had grown up since the last time we had talked.

"Thanks, shes doing as good as anyone could. Shes home now and starting back at school soon so shes slowly getting back to normal. Hey Jax, why did I see you talking with my dad the other day at the hospital. I don't mean to be forward or rude, I'm just wondering why anyone from SAMCRO would seem interested in what was going on in that room. I also heard Gemma, had a little talk with Tristan" I said bluntly wanting to know what was going on that my father was so hesitant to let me in on.

"Aw you know Holly. It's Charming it's a small town news got around pretty quickly. Were just trying to offer our help in anyway we can. Listen I gotta run but were having a little get together at the club tomorrow Opie's back. You should stop by, I know it's been awhile since you guys have seen each other" he said with another wink.

"Yeah I will think about it, maybe I will see you then" I said sighing as I watched him climb on the familiar bike and give a quick waive before he took off down the street most likely headed back to Teller and Morrow.

It had been years since I had seen Opie. I had met Opie through Jax when we were only sixteen. I had quickly fallen for him, and taken every chance I could to sneak out of the house to ride for hours on the back of his bike my arms wrapped tight around his waist. I loved Opie and even at such a young put everything into our relationship. I stayed with him for almost four years. I had been the one with him when he left his mom and came back to Charming and he joined the sons. I had been right beside Tara as we both were convinced getting the crow tattoos on our lower backs was all it took to convince Opie and Jax we were in it for the long haul. I had trusted him when he told me we would be together for ever, that was until I found out he had been with some random crow eater.

I hadn't heard much from Opie since then, once I had ended our relationship convinced he would cheat again he tried to change my mind but I had been stubborn and was quick to run away at the quickest convince. The last I heard he had been married to a girl I never met, they had two kids fairly quick and now he was doing a five year stint in prison. I had been jealous when I first heard he was married, I had always imagined I would one day be Mrs. Winston but hearing he was in prison reminded me exactly why I had run from him and SAMCRO. According to Jax he was back in town now, a thought that caused me more anxiety then I would like to admit. Part of me wanted to go see him, the other part of me wanted to head back to my car parked down the street and leave this town behind once again. I didn't know what I would do if I came face to face with Opie Winston again but at this point I wasn't ready to find out.


	4. Tomorrow

**Thanks everyone for reading and following. I have a ton of ideas for this story and will be diving into more SAMCRO content in the next two chapters so keep checking back. I own nothing but Holly everything else belongs to Kurt Sutter. **

"Holly, who are you going to see tonight. Is it Tara?" I heard the sound of my sisters voice as I pulled clothes out of my old closet tossing them on the bed trying to find something decent to wear on my date tonight with the handsome stranger I had not stopped thinking about.

"No not Tara. Just a friend I'm only going to be out for a bit and then I will be back before you know it." I said as I went continued digging through the closet mentally kicking myself for agreeing to the date in the first place. I was coming to Charming for my sister, how the hell did I agree to a date with someone I was never going to see again. Sure he was gorgeous and that damn mohawk had been running through my mind but what was I expecting from a one time thing. I shook my head forcing myself to let go of the thought before hearing her voice again.

"Your not going to find something here. I looked through your closet a few weeks ago its all old stuff from when you still lived her" Tristan said quickly leaving the room before I could shoot back any sort of reply. Without thinking I took my sisters attitude as a clue and headed out hoping I could find some clothing store in Charming which would help me find some outfit for tonight. I silently began hating on myself for putting to much thought into the date but I couldn't help but also want the relief of a stress free night that could be fun.

Within a few minutes I was heading through the local mall when I turned a corner, almost walking straight into the man I was hoping to avoid. I slowly looked up at the tall man in front of me, the man who still looked more then familiar. He still had the same long hair tucked under a hat, with that dark beard I had always begged him to grown. His arms were now filled with more tattoos then I last remembered, and he was sporting the same SAMCRO cut I had slid off his back more then once before.

"Opie, hi" I said taken back a moment, silently cursing myself for going out in the first place.

"Holly, what are you doing here? I thought you were long gone from Charming" he said pulling me into a hug that felt more comfortable then I wished.

I slowly pulled myself back trying to escape the familiar feeling of his arms wrapped around me. That same god damn smell that had always comforted me before. "I'm here to visit with my sister. Im hopefully leaving tomorrow morning but I'll see how shes doing first. I should get going though. It was nice to see you" I said quickly hoping to get away from him as soon as I could, not wanting to get sucked back into Opie's world.

As I walked away I heard his voice again "Holly, please don't go" in that same deep voice I had heard many times before.

"Opie, It's not a good time. I'm glad your out. I heard you got married and had a few kids. Congratulations." I called out before heading as fast as I could in the opposite direction, needing to get away from the one person I had left Charming to hopefully avoid.

Without realizing it the simple sight of my old boyfriend had quickly reminded me of exactly why I had loved and hated Charming all at the same time. I felt torn, part of me wanted to go back to him and beg him for some sort of answer. Ask him why it had been so easy to cheat on me and give up on what we once had but it had been easier for him to promise someone else a lifetime together. The other part of me wanted to leave town as soon as Tristan promised me she was okay so I could slowly began forgetting about Charming and try to let go of my lost love.

I was quick to slip into one of the closet clothing shops, knowing even if he wanted to follow me there was no way Opie Winston would be seen in one of these shops. Without putting to much thought into I quickly searched the racks for something that would fit tight against my thin frame. It didn't take me long to find a short black dress that seemed to hug my curves in all the right places when I tried it on in the bright changing room. Normally I tended to dress a little more conservative but after my quick run in with Opie I was determined to not over think this date and planned on having more fun then usual.

I handed the young girl my credit card as she cashed through the dress and passed me back the bag before I quickly abandoned the mall. I felt like I was running towards my car hoping to avoid the possibility of running into another blast past from the past in this increasingly small town. It seemed like only a few moments later when I was returning home, hoping to get a few hours to spend with Tristan before my date with the handsome stranger.

After spending some much needed down time hiding in my parents home watching old re runs of 90's teen sitcoms with my little sister I had pulled myself out of her bed and forced myself to get changed. I was quick to shower before adding makeup and tried to create a slight waive in my hair, finishing it off by slipping into the tight dress and adding a pair of black flats. I couldn't help but look myself over in the mirror, very happy with the results. It had been a long time since I had dressed up to go out, tonight I was going to go out and focus on having fun. I was going to flirt with the stranger and hopefully forget about the dull ache I had been feeling since stepping foot back into Charming. I quickly got in the car and made my way to the local coffee shop were we had planned on meeting up. Sure enough as I parked the car outside of the shop I spotted the now familiar Mohawk leaning against the shop with a cigarette in between his lips.

I smirked as I watched him take a few drags from the smoke before dropping it and stomping it out as he spotted me. I forced myself to take a deep breath as I opened the door, slightly running my hands down the dress hoping it looked as good as I imagined. I shut the door behind me stepping foot on the pavement and slowly made my way towards him, making sure he got a good long view of the lengths I had ending up going to hopefully impress him.

"Long time no see" I said as he flashed that gorgeous smile at me.

"To long. You look amazing. Well done" he said with a quick wink as he pulled me into a hug. I was happy to see him changed out of the same hoodie I had seen him in the two previous days. He was wearing a buttoned up blue shirt that showed off how big his arms were and seemed to fit tightly across his abs. A look I much preferred as he slowly pulled away giving me a quick once over before he flashed me with another grin.

"Thanks. I didn't really know what you had planned so wasn't to sure what to wear."

"Well you did a damn good job. I don't know how your gonna do on the bike though" he said slipping his hand into mine as he lead me towards a nearby motorcycle.

"You ride?" I asked trying to hide the fact that I wasn't impressed by the idea of dating another biker.

"Yeah. I hope thats not a problem. Have you ever been on a bike?" a quick look of panic flashed across his face.

"No problem. Doesn't do wonders for the dress but it's alright. Yeah I have. Do you have something I can wear I'm just a bit exposed here" I said motioning to the dress that showed off more skin then it hid.

"Yeah sorry. Here" he said quickly undoing the shirt I had previously been admiring him, now leaving him standing in front of me in a grey t shirt, showing for the first time his arms filled with tattoos and revealing the true size of the muscles that had been hidden by the hoodie. He passed me the shirt, without thinking I quickly slipped it over my bare shoulders happy for the little bit of warmth it would provide once on the back of his bike. I was suddenly happy I had opted for the flats as I watched him climb on the bike, quickly starting it. He flashed me another grin as I stepped forward.

"Your lucky I don't do this for just anyone" I couldn't help but admit out loud as I climbed on behind him. As he pulled out of the parking spot and quickly took off down the road, I slid my arms around his chest holding him close as he drove. It had been years since I had been in this same position with Opie, I had sworn I would never look at another bike again but now years later holding on to someone whose name I knew only as Juice and I had met two days earlier I felt excited. I was happy to be holding on to him, happy to see him flash that grin at me. I was silently hoping he didn't have plans of ending this night anytime soon.

I heard his voice as he glanced back at me "You okay?"

"I'm perfect" I said for the first time since coming back to Charming and for the first time in a long time actually meaning it as I felt the wind blow through my waiving hair, instantly feeling the stress of the town melt away.


	5. Hard to Love

I lost track of how long we were on the back of his bike as we drove along. I realized not long after we began the journey he was headed out of Charming which was okay with me. I wanted a night of fun, I did not need another run in with someone who I used to know. How would I explain Juice? How would I explain how I was back in town. It was to much to think about so I was more then happy to go along with his plan. I felt myself relax as we drove down a long stretch of highway that seemed to be almost empty. I found myself gripping his chest closer every time he leaned the bike to turn. Silently I couldn't help but smile as I breathed in the strong scent of his cologne. I was thankful he did not have the option to see my face from his drivers seat. The red tone that was surely covering my cheeks would be a dead give away to my true feelings at the moment.

I had been so calm I hadn't even noticed when he began turning into a large parking lot. He found a spot for his bike not far from a small restaurant before killing the engine. I slowly pushed off the back of the bike, trying to adjust my dress with as much dignity as I could muster before smirking as I watched him climb of the bike and shove the keys back into his pockets now joining me on the pavement.

"I guess you will be needing this back" I said slowly undoing each button on his shirt that fit me more like a second dress.

"As good as it looks on you. If you don't mind I will take it back" he reached out and slowly and began undoing the buttons for me, gently pulling me closer to him. Before I realized what was happening his lips seemed to be crashing into mine. Without thinking my arms wrapped around his neck as he pulled me deeper into the kiss well he wrapped his arms around my waist. We stood there for what felt like a few minutes before he slowly pulled his lips from mine.

"I figured I would get the first kiss out of the way before the end of the date" he said with another wink and a smirk as he slowly slid the shirt from my arms before slipping it back on himself.

"Smart idea. Now that we've got that out of the way Juice. When do I get to know your real name? I am assuming your parents didn't give you that one" I mentioned now curious to know more about him as I let my fingers slowly do up the buttons on his shirt that he had previously been undoing on me.

"It's Juan Carlos" he mentioned just as he slowly slipped his hand under my chin tilting it slightly before kissing me once more. "I prefer Juice" he said with another wink as he pulled away once again.

He quickly slipped his hand into mine and began leading me towards the restaurant. I was pleasantly surprised when we stepped in the small place, there was a few tables filled with couples, the tables lite with candles. Without a word to me Juice muttered something to the girl standing at the door who proceeded to lead us to a table in the back corner. I was even more shocked when he pulled out the chair for me before sitting across from me. It had seemed like a very long time since I had met a man like Juan Carlos.

After we ordered a bottle of wine we sat there for what felt like forever. We drank and we ate and we talked. He told me about this father leaving when he was young, mentioning he had never actually met the man who was more like a stranger. I told him about leaving Charming mentioning it was over an ended relationship. I understood when he said he had come to the town to avoid trouble he had left behind in New York. He understood when I told him my sister had been attacked, comforting me when he mentioned he had heard about the incident. I had been so caught up in listening to him I hadn't even realized the small restaurant had cleared out, leaving us as the last couple there. I watched as the waitress silently slide the cheque on the table before walking away again.

"I guess thats our cue to leave" he mentioned as he slipped some bills from his wallet before leaving it on the table. I wasn't used to someone carrying money these days, let alone that amount of money but I forced myself to let the thought go as he stood from his chair holding his hand out to me with that smile.

I stood slowly letting my hands slip into his as he once again lead me out the way we had come in. I suddenly found myself wishing I wasn't planning on leaving Charming so soon. After the night with him I wasn't ready to say goodnight to Juice. The idea of a fun night out with no stress had turned into a night with someone I wasn't ready to walk away from just yet. He silently slipped the same shirt off again before passing it to me, he once again slowly messed with the buttons this time making sure they were covering my exposed skin before he threw his leg over the bike. I followed his lead and silently slipped right back into the seat behind letting my hands wrap around his chest as I felt the familiar feel of the bike take off.

Once again I was instantly relaxed as he drove down the now empty roads. I found myself leaning my head against his back holding his chest tighter as we drove in silence. It was only when the Charming signs came back into view that I realized we were close to getting back to reality. I was suddenly hit with that anxiety I had left behind the minute he had appeared in front of me at that coffee shop earlier on in the night. I wasn't ready to face my family, or anyone else I had previously known in this small town. I wasn't ready to face the fact that I had a home some where else and eventually needed to go back to it. I wasn't ready to face the fact that I wanted to see Juice again, I suddenly didn't want him to be a one night thing.

My thoughts were interrupted as I felt him lean the bike again as he turned into the parking lot of my hotel. He pulled into another empty spot and killed the engine one more time before we climbed off the bike for the last time that night. We repeated our earlier routine he slid the shirt from my shoulders as he pulled me into a kiss before swearing it would be the last one of the night.

"You know we don't have to end the night here" I said with a wink before kissing his cheek softly.

"Oh really?" he raised an eyebrow at me with a grin when the quick blare of his cell phone interrupted our conversation.

"Shit, sorry babe I'll be one minute" he said before flipping open the cell and walking away as he muttered something into the other end in a hushed tone.

I couldn't help but try to listen to the conversation as I stood by myself beside his bike, silently watching him pace around the parking lot but it seemed like he was doing more of the listening and the small bits of conversation I was getting from his end were to hard to make out. It was only a moment later when he shoved the phone back into pocket and made his way back to me.

"I am so sorry but I've gotta run. They need me. I would really love a rain check though" he said with that handsome grin as he wrapped his arms around my waist pulling me closer to him.

"Sure, I'm in town for at lest another day or two. How about tomorrow?" I asked slightly disappointed I was going to miss out on the chance to spend more time with Juice tonight but happy he seemed to want to see me again.

"Tomorrows good, actually were having this thing for one of my friends if your interested. It should be fun. You can come over have a few drinks, you can meet my friends and then maybe you can stay the night" he said with a wink again his hands quickly finding their way to my ass.

I nodded, I had never been one to shy away from a party. Usually I would mind meeting a potential boyfriends friends but I was leaving town in a few days. As much as I wanted to spend time with Juice I didn't see this going anywhere long term so meeting his friends didn't seems like a big deal.

"Sure sounds fun. Will you pick me up?" I asked silently hoping I would get the chance to ride with him at lest one more time before I left town.

"Of course. I'll pick you up at eight. See you then gorgeous" he muttered softly as he pulled me in for one final deep kiss before slowly pulling away and jumping back on the bike we had just been on together.

"Be safe" I called out watching as he nodded to me before once again pulling out of the spot and drove off quickly leaving my view. I stood their for a few minutes still hearing the sound of his bike before I forced myself to go back into the hotel alone.

The next morning I once again began my new routine. I quickly showered and dressed before heading over to my parents house. I spent as much time as I could with Tristan, trying to judge for myself how she was doing. She seemed to be getting back to her normal routine but at this point how was I supposed to tell. I promised her well she was still in the hospital I wasn't going to leave town again until she told me she was okay, no matter how long that took. Now that it had been a few days I had originally thought she would be ready to see me go once again, but after last night I was silently thankfully she hadn't given me the go ahead just yet.

We had spent all day watching movies until I finally convinced her to leave the house. She had been begging my mother to take her to the mall so she could buy a few new outfits but once again my mother had forced her to stay inside, or in my opinion to keep her away from Charming's probing eyes. I convinced her to ignore my mothers pleas and gave into her wish taking her to the local mall. I hadn't wanted to go almost positive if I did it would result in another run in with Opie Winston but I forced myself to think about her and gave in. Once again I found myself in the same stores I had the day before, filling my sisters arms with clothes when once again I heard Tara's voice from behind her.

"Holly, Tristan hey what are you guys doing here? I thought you would have left by now Holly?" she asked as she joined us in the corner of the crowded store.

"Tristan wanted to get a few new outfits. No I'm not in so much of a rush so I will probably being staying until Tristan gets sick of me" I mentioned nudging my sister softly.

"Well thats really nice. Holly, Jax mentioned he ran into you I hope you can make it tonight." Tara started saying before Tristan began pulling on my arm, our signal that she wanted to get home as asap. Something my mother had made her promise she would do when we left the house, something I was thankful for now that it got me out of the conversation about SAMCRO with Tara. Tara had been the one who agreed with her that staying away from the sons would be best for both of them and now years later she was once again back in Jax's life and in turn back in SAMCRO's life.

"Oh yeah he did mention something for Opie, I don't know if I will be able to make that. I have a thing tonight but if I do hopefully I'll see you. We've gotta run though" I said motioning to Tristan to leave the store before I nodded once again at Tara.

Without much talking we made it back to the house, in just enough time I was able to drop Tristan off before making it back to the hotel to prepare for my second date with Juice. I was still in shock I had agreed to meet his friends, something I normally didn't agree to so soon especially after only one date with the guy but Juice was different. He was more focused on fun and at lest now when I did leave Charming I could convince myself I had put in an effort in with the few dates.

Once it hit eight o'clock I strolled down stairs, this time sporting another tight black dress that hugged my curves showing a little less cleavage then the night before. I had curled my hair and put on make up but this time I was more focused on impressing his friends then trying to make his jaw drop. I couldn't help but smile as my eyes found him leaning against his bike flashing that grin at me. I quickly rushed towards him, without saying anything I wrapped my arounds around his neck and pulled him into a deep kiss.

Normally I was not so courages, but I liked Juice and since I would be leaving soon I wanted to waste no time with him. I smiled into the second kiss as I felt his hands grip my waist.

"Wow babe you sure do you make an entrance" he laughed as he slowly pulled away from me before giving me a quick glance over. "You look gorgeous" he mentioned as he kissed my cheek softly, a simple act that seemed to send a shiver down my spine.

"Thank you, your not so bad yourself" I winked as I watched him climb back on the bike quickly starting it before I once again climbed on behind him. I smiled as my arms gripped his chest and the scent of his cologne hit me quickly before he pulled out of the parking lot and back on to the streets of Charming. I smiled as we drove, finding myself wondering how his friends would react to me. My thoughts were interrupted when I noticed his hand grip the handle bar as he began turning down a familiar street. I slowly let my eyes drift up his arm, I forced my eyes to focus on the tattoos that covered a fair bit of his muscular arms. It was then I noticed the familiar reaper symbol. I began to feel the familiar anxiety I felt when I came in contact with that god damn reaper.

I tried to tell myself it was not the same reaper. I tried to tell myself this wasn't happening, I tried to tell myself that we were not on our way to see his friends. For the rest of that short bike ride I tried to tell myself a lot of things but it only took a quick look at the Teller Morrow sign as we pulled into the familiar parking lot that confirmed my fears. When I felt the bike come to a stop and Juice killed the engine I slowly slid off the bike not sure what to do.

I was torn I liked Juice and he seemed to like me but what would happen when he found out I knew his crew. What would he do when he found out I had been so close to becoming and old lady. How could I deal with dating someone from SAMCRO. I had left Charming to escape Opie and the groups family like promises that seemed to mean even if you didn't want to be in on their club they could call on you whenever they felt necessary. I slowly climbed off the bike and turned to him, hoping to avoid any of the previous sons who were well aware of who I am. When he followed behind me and climbed off the bike I sighed. I silently took his hand in mine and stretched out his arm now seeing the clear reaper tattoo.

"Your a son" I muttered as our eyes met again.


	6. Buzzkill

I held his hand in mine watching as he looked down at his tattoo that I had just been so focused on. He locked eyes on it for a moment before he looked up at me. I felt his hand drop mine knowing what was coming next couldn't be good.

"Yeah I am. Is that going to be a problem?" he asked with a raised eyebrow and the slight hint of attitude.

I silently shook my head trying to think of a reasonable response. There was only a few ways to answer his question without causing him to tell me to hit the road. I either could tell him the truth that I couldn't see any future with a son that would turn out differently then my past relationship with Opie or could pretend I hadn't been to the club house a million times before, and hope to god no one remembered me. I had no idea how this could go or how Juice would react to any of this. All I knew was I really liked Juice and even though I was only in town for another day or two I didn't want the sons to impact how he felt about me or how I felt about him.

Before I could decide what to do I heard a deep yell from behind us. "Juice about time you showed up brother" the familiar curly haired brunette said with a deep voice as he walked up to us.

I silently stepped back, hoping he wouldn't recognize me. It had been a long time since I had seen Tig and I had changed quite a bit. I crossed my fingers behind my back hoping Juice would introduce me and I could act like this whole thing was a first for me. I watched as Tig turned and looked at me for a moment.

"Well who do we have here?" he asked giving me a quick once over, quickly giving me the impression Juice was not one of the sons who seemed to bring girls to the club house often.

I didn't have a second to respond when I watched his jaw slightly drop. "Holy shit" he belted out before pulling me into a hug.

"Holly fucking Oswald, it's been a long time" he said slowly pulling away from the hug before turning his attention back to Juice who I was positive would definitely have questions now.

"Wait a minute you know each other?" I heard Juice question.

I nodded silently again, still not sure what to do or say next. I felt like I was frozen in place. For once in my life I was completely speechless and had no idea what to do next.

"Have you not told him blondie?" Tig asked looking back at me and quickly back at Juice.

Before I could respond at all Juice quickly raised another brow "Tell me what?."

"I'm gonna leave you guys alone. When your ready everyone is inside. Op will be happy to see you Holly." Tig called over his shoulder before taking off towards the club house.

I couldn't help but let out a deep sigh. I felt shell shocked. One moment I had been happier then I had been in a long time just riding on the back of his bike holding him. Within minutes that had all come to a crashing halt and Tig's presence seemed to throw a grenade into the whole situation. There was no way I could come out of that conversation with Juice not knowing about my past with his crew. There was no way I could come out of this without reliving my past with SAMCRO.

"Holly what did he mean?" he asked with a raised brow as he sat on his bike quickly crossing his arms as he starred up at me.

"Listen Juice, I didn't hide anything from you. I just didn't know where we were going we've only been out a few times and don't get me wrong I really like you but I had no idea you were with SAMCRO so why would have I told the guy I'm trying to impress I had anything to do with the sons" I said stepping closer to him with a smirk hoping he would take that as a good reason I hadn't mentioned my past association with SAMCRO.

I watched him for a moment and felt relived when he cracked that now familiar grin. "So your trying to impress me" he said as he stood from the bike and quickly wrapped his arms around my waist and without a word pulled me into a deep kiss.

"Your doing a good job gorgeous" he whispered in my ear before slowly pulling back from the kiss. He slipped one arm around my waist and turned towards the club house.

I wanted to go in and not mention my real past with SAMCRO and just have fun with Juice but I couldn't do that to him. It was obvious with my recent run in with Jax Teller, Opie and now Tig the club hadn't completely forgotten about me. I didn't want Juice to hear it from one of them.

I grabbed his hand and tightened my grip for a moment. "Juice, before we go in I need to tell you something else" I said sighing as I watched him turn back towards me.

"Whats up beautiful?" he asked with another smile.

"Before we go in I just want you to know everything. Please don't say anything I just need to get this out. I met Jax and Opie in school they were a couple years older then me. I was best friends with Tara, when she hooked up with Jax I ended up getting close with Opie. We were together for four years. I loved him Juice but he cheated with a crow eater so I left him. I've moved on and I know he has long ago. I just wanted you to know before we go in there" I said with a deep sigh.

I hated myself for laying that on him but I couldn't have walked in there knowing he wasn't aware of my past with Opie.

He stepped back from me. He ran his hand along the back of his neck before he turned back to his bike. I held my breath waiting for his response to what I had just spit out at him but he said nothing as he opened his saddle bag and pulled out his familiar cut. I watched him quickly sling the leather over his shoulders, the reaper now visible on his back before he turned back towards me and held out his hand again.

"Lets go" was all he said to me.

"Wait Juice, don't you want to talk about this?"

"Holly, theres nothing to talk about. You used to be Opies girl. Your not anymore and hes married end of story. Let's go have a good time" he said again as I took his hand and followed him into the familiar club house.

The minute we stepped inside it was like a blast from the past. I had snuck inside the club house many times over with Opie sneaking down the hall to his fathers room and then on to his own room when he became a member. I couldn't help but smile at the sight of how little things had changed. Most of my memories from this place were all good, it wasn't the club house or the members of SAMCRO that I had grown to hate. It was what the club did to the members and their families that I had hated.

It seemed like the door behind us didn't even have a chance to close when I heard "Juicey boy we need you" the scottish yell came from some where behind the crowds of people.

"Shit, I'll be right back are you good?" he asked me as he was searching the crowds looking for the Chibs.

"Yeah, I will get a drink don't worry about me" I said.

"Okay, Ill be back" he said giving me a quick kiss before he disappeared into the crowds of people.

I headed over towards their bar leaning against it waiting for the young prospect's attention. It only took him a moment before he walked over to me. "What can I get you?" he asked as he looked me over clearly trying to remember if I was someones old lady.

"Vodka and cranberry please" I said tapping my hand along the wood of the bar as I waited.

Before he slid the drink over I felt an arm slid around my waist. I turned expecting Juice but was surprised to find Opie standing there.

"Thanks for coming Holly" he said as he signalled the prospect for another drink.

"No problem. I'm not here for you though Op. I'm here with Juice" I blurted out making it as clear to him as I could that I was not here for him and had no intention of spending my time in Charming with him.

"Juice, your here with Juice" he repeated my own words.

"Yes Opie I'm here with Juice" I said taking a quick drink now feeling the need for vodka more then ever.

"Holly, you don't need an excuse to get in here like Juice. If you wanted to come tonight you could have just come the club misses you, I miss you".

"I didn't need an excuse and I didn't want to come tonight Opie. I like Juice we've gone on a couple of dates I'm here to meet his friends thats it" I said stepping away from him as I turned looking through the crowds now desperate to lock eyes on Juice needing a good reason to get away from Opie.

"Wow well good for you Holly, I'm happy for you. Listen do you mind if we go talk for a minute. Theres a lot I've wanted to say to you"

"Yeah I do mind Op why don't you go talk with your wife" I spit out as I slid my now empty glass towards the prospect. "Another vodka please".

"She's not here. She is not the biggest fan of SAMCRO" he muttered.

"Wow Opie another woman in your life not wanting anything to do with this club your not seeing a pattern there" I smirked now feeling the buzz of the alcohol hit me as I took a sip of the refill the prospect had placed in front of me.

"Thats bullshit and you know that. She doesn't want me back in the club so I don't end up doing time again thats it. It has nothing to do with SAMCRO. When are you going to stop using the club as your excuse for leaving Holly, or do you forget the fact that your the one who left me" he said like it was nothing.

"Do you remember why I left you Opie. You can blame it on me all you want but your the one who went and fucked some crow eater. I loved you and you cheated on me." I basically yelled at him before I turned to find the door.

I felt his hand grab my arm, I quickly turned back to him ready to slap him when before I could do anything Juice's fist came out of no where quickly knocking against Opie's jaw.


	7. Remind Me

I was in complete shock as I watched Juice's fist crash against Opies jaw. Opie stepped back for a quick moment and without another word knocked his head against Juice's sending him falling back against the nearby bar stools.

"Stop" I yelled out as I watched Juice lunge back at Opie throwing another punch.

I watched helpless as Juice continued throwing his fist against Opies jaw until I heard a loud yell.

"Enough" Jax yelled as he pushed through the crowd of people who were now all focused on Opie and Juice. He quickly jumped between them, pushing them apart before he could say anything Opie started in on Juice.

"What did you think I was going to do Juice. I was just talking to her. She's not even your old lady" Opie yelled over Jax.

"You grabbed her Op she was trying to leave" he yelled back taking a step closer to Opie when Jax quickly pushed him back.

"I was talking to her. Remember she has that crow on her lower back because of me Juice. She is using you to get here to see me" Opie yelled back.

"Wheres your wife Opie or did you drive another woman away" Juice yelled before Chibs jumped in beside Jax.

"Come on Juicey boy lets take this outside and calm down" he seemed to whisper in Juices ear as he threw his arm over Juices shoulder and lead him outside.

I watched for a moment as Jax backed Opie up against a nearby wall and was clearly saying something to Opie that did not seem to be going over well. Before I could do anything I watched as Opie pushed Jax back and headed for the door. I held my breath expecting to hear the sounds of another fight but was relieved when I heard the familiar sound of a bike start up knowing that Opie was headed home.

I headed towards the door hoping I would get the chance to speak with Juice. As I passed by I heard the voice of the clubs president as he sat on a beer stool.

"Holly Oswald is back in town, there goes the neighbourhood"

I ignored the old mans voice as I pushed through the door. I glanced around the parking lot looking for the two men. It only took a moment before I spotted them. Juice was leaning against the garage door his arms crossed over his chest, his mouth wasn't moving and his eyes were starring straight ahead. Clearly Chibs was lecturing him.

I slowly walked over to Juices now familiar bike and sat down. I sat there for a few moments watching them. I hated myself for doing this to Juice. I should have just focused on my sister when I came to Charming. I didn't have to go out with Juice and I didn't have to meet his friend. I could have left when I found out he was in SAMCRO. I could have avoided all of this and Juice would have been better off, I would have been better off.

This is exactly why I had avoided Charming. I had left this behind, I had left SAMCRO and all that it brought with it behind and in a matter of days I was right back in. I sighed running my hands along my exposed arms, feeling the cold more then I had when we first arrived to the club house. It seemed like only a moment later when Chibs walked away leaving Juice alone. I hesitated I wanted to go to him, but I wasn't sure if he would want to see me. The other half of me knew I should turn and walk away and leave Charming and SAMCRO behind once again. Before I could do anything I noticed him lookup. When our eyes met he didn't hesitate like I currently was. He slowly started walking towards me his eyes locked on mine.

When he reached me I stood up "Juice I'm sorry" I started to say before he cut me off.

"Don't" was all her muttered before he quickly wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me into a deep kiss. It was only a moment later when he pulled back his hands now cupping my cheeks.

I pulled back slightly "Wait Juice shouldn't we just talk about what happened in there" I motioned towards the club house. Now that he was standing in front of me I could see the full effect of his fight with Opie. His lip had a small cut on his and cheek had a red glow that would no doubt turn into a dark bruise.

"That was nothing" he replied as he pulled away from me and quickly got on his bike.

"I have to say something Juice. He was lying in there. Yes I did get that fucking tattoo because of him but I was young and stupid. I didn't use you to get to him. I didn't even know you were in SAMCRO. I was here for you" I spit out so fast I wasn't sure he could take it all in but I was desperate to get it through to him.

"That was only a few punches and its fine. Me and Op will be fine tomorrow. He grabbed you when you clearly didn't want him to. Your not his old lady and he needed to remember that. Now I'm leaving Holly, I would really like it if you got on the back of the bike and came with me but thats up to you" he said. It was obvious in his voice what had happened in there was some what normal to him, which was a thought that scared me.

Without a word I quickly climbed on to the back of his bike. I let my arms slip around his chest feeling the leather of his cut as I clung to him. I instantly felt relieved as he started his bike and pulled out of the parking lot. I was happy now, it was just me and Juice again as we drove farther from Teller and Morrow.

It seemed like only a few moments later when he pulled up in front of the hotel I was staying at. My happy feeling that I had moments before, suddenly disappeared. I had guessed he wouldn't want to see me anymore after what had happened tonight. I was a girl he had just met, a girl he had no ties to. Why would he want to spend more time with the girl who caused him to fight with one of his brothers he had known much longer. He was supposed to be with crow eaters not a former future old lady who had turned her back on the club once before. I wanted to spend the night with him but clearly he was ready for me to go home and leave him alone.

I climbed off the back of his bike and on to the pavement. I was surprised when he followed behind me and climbed off the bike. "Can I come up?" he asked as he flashed me that wide grin.

"Yes" I couldn't help but answer as I let out a laugh. I was shocked that the man who had just fought for me was now flashing me a million dollar smile. It was another trait that caused me to want to get to know him more.

"Remember I'm a good girl though" I called over my shoulder as we stepped into the hotel lobby.

We quickly stepped into a nearby elevator. I smirked as I watched Juice hold the door open for a family and couldn't help but notice their double takes as they eyed his cut. Charming was no strangers to the sons and most of the town had no issues with the club but every once in awhile you would run into a few who wanted to stay as far away from the We rode the rest of the way to my floor in silence. When we reached my floor I grabbed his hand and lead him into the hallway.

I slid my key card through the door lock when we reached my room. I pushed through the door and was relieved to see house cleaning had already been there in my absence.

"Aren't the boys going to miss you tonight?" I asked as I slid my heels off and tossed them next to the bed.

"Not tonight, they will be partying for the rest of the night and they will see me tomorrow" he smirked as he slid his cut off and tossed it on a nearby chair.

I had always been a girl who hated to admit it but was attracted to the reaper cut. I had begged Opie to wear it when we were together and had taken second glances at most of the members of SAMCRO back in the day. But when it came to Juice as attractive as it was I couldn't help but admit I was relieved to see him without it.

"Do you want a drink?" I called out as I ducked to start raiding the mini fridge in the room.

"No I'm good"

I grabbed a small bottle of vodka and can of coke from the fridge and placed it on a nearby desk before I turned to see him sitting on the edge of the bed.

"Thanks for coming back with me Juice. I was worried after what happened you wouldn't want to see me again" I admit hoping he wouldn't take my honesty as rushing whatever was happening between the two of us. I made my way over to him now standing directly in front of him.

"I told you gorgeous, that was nothing. Opie and I will be fine" he said softly as he wrapped his arms around my waist pulling me closer to him.

I let my hands cups his cheeks as I looked into his gorgeous brown eyes. I softly ran my hand over his bruised cheek. Just as I leaned into kiss him I heard his cell phone ring.

"Shit I'm sorry babe one second" he muttered as he searched his pockets before pulling out a cell phone and pulled it to his ear.

I pulled away from him and fell into a nearby chair as I watched him stood from the bed and began to walk the room. "Seriously right now. Shit, okay I'll be there as soon as I can" he almost yelled into the phone before he shoved the phone back into the pocket it had come from.

"Holly, I'm sorry I gotta go its club stuff. I'll call you when I'm done if its not to late maybe we can meet up" he muttered as he pulled on the cut I had been happy to see him remove.

My stomach dropped, I felt like I was relieving my past with Opie. In that moment I instantly re thought all of the past few days. I liked Juice that was true, I liked him more then I had liked a guy in long time. I didn't want to give up on him so fast, but I didn't want to deal with SAMCRO when I had been away for so long. I wasn't prepared to spend my future with Juice playing second best to the club.

"Okay, be safe" was all I could manage to mutter when he leaned down and kissed me. I silently watched as he left the room leaving me alone again.


	8. This Life Would Kill Me

**Thanks everyone for all the great reviews and follows. This is my first attempt at a fan fiction so I appreciate all the views and comments. I will be adding more of SAMCRO's in the next few chapters. **

It had been three days since I had last seen Juice. He had called me the night he left me alone in my hotel, muttering off some excuse about doing a late night run with Tig and then a quick trip up to Nevada in a voicemail when I ignored his call. I had planned to see him when he came back to Charming but as the days past I couldn't help but feel it might be better if I left before he returned to town.

I had spent the afternoon with Tristen, taking her shopping before she needed to get home for her violin practises my mom forced her to do.

"Tristen, we gotta go. You know mom will be super pissed at the both of us if we don't get you back in time" I called out as she searched through a rack of nearby clothes, in some young teens store she had begged me to go into.

"Alright lets go" She muttered as we began walking out of the store. Just as we stepped back into the mall I heard another familiar voice.

"Holly Oswald, I heard you were back in town. Tristen how are you doing sweetheart?" Gemma Morrow asked.

It had been a long time since I had laid eyes on SAMCRO's presidents old lady. Out of everyone involved with the club Gemma had always been one of my favourites. She had always been sweet to me even though she had her issues with Tara who at the time I was always with. She knew Opie was in a tough spot and became a second mom to him and myself. When she heard about Opie she had begged me to give him another chance but gave me her blessing when I left town.

"Gemma, it's been awhile" I smiled as she pulled me into a hug.

"To long. How have you've been? I heard you had a bit of a run in with Opie" she mentioned as she pulled back from the hug.

"Yeah. I wish it hadn't gone down like that. I think I caught him off guard he didn't know I was going to be there. Hell I didn't know I was going to be there." I said with a laugh trying to make light of the situation that hadn't left my head since the moment it happened.

"No matter what circumstance hunny it would have gone down like that. You were Op's girl and when you left it broke his heart. Sure hes happy with Donna and they have a life together but she doesn't support him like you did. She wants him out of the club and you know Opie, the club is his life he has no intention of leaving. He wants that supportive old lady back" she said with a famous Gemma smirk.

"I'm not his old lady Gemma. I never got to be he was the one who cheated, he couldn't even bother to hide it from me. It was over a long time ago and we've both moved on" I said hoping Gemma would drop the topic of Opie. I was done talking about Opie, I hated that I wanted to talk about him.

"I know baby, I hear you've moved on anyway. I'm happy for you Juice is a good boy" she winked.

I couldn't help but laugh and nod. "He is very nice but I'm only in town for a few days. I'll be leaving any day soon. It's nothing serious were just seeing each other." I said hoping Gemma would take the hint that my sudden trip back to Charming did not mean I had any intentions of moving back for good.

"Well be nice to him. He doesn't bring many girls home, you must have meant something to him. I'll let you girls get back to shopping. Come back and visit next time your home sweetie" Gemma smiled as she pulled me into another hug.

"Nice to see you Gemma" I muttered before I pulled back from the hug and quickly wrapped my arm around Tristens shoulders leading her closer to the mall doors.

"Come on mom is going to kill us" I mumbled to her as we began searching the crowded parking lot for my car.

We had just climbed into my beat up Toyota when I turned to see Tristen crying in the passengers seat.

"Tristen hunny what is wrong?" I asked as I quickly wiped at the tears now running down her cheeks.

"I don't want you to leave again. I don't want to deal with mom and dad by myself. I don't want you to go back. Im sorry I know you don't want to be here but you were gone for so long" she burst out as the tears continued to fall down her cheeks.

"Tristen it's okay. I promise I'm going to stay longer okay don't worry. Lets get back home before mom thinks were dead" I smirked as I handed her a kleenex I pulled out of my purse before pulling out of the parking lot and heading home.

An hour later I dropped Tristen off at the house and headed back down town. I hated the situation I was currently in. I had left Charming years ago and was happy to do so. Now my little sister was begging me to say. That little girl had always had me wrapped around her finger and now with her situation I was already hesitant to leave her, her pleas just cemented my decision that Charming would once again because me home at lest temporarily.

I parked my car in front of the hotel. Just as I climbed out of the car and stepped foot on to the nearby sidewalk I noticed a familiar bike parked two spaces behind me. I knew it belonged to Juice. I sighed, as much as I liked Juice I had avoided his calls well he was gone and I couldn't help but admit to myself that I was worried if we came face to face I would fall right back into this hold he seemed to have on me.

I walked into the buildings lobby and quickly spotted him leaning against the wall near the elevators his arms crossed over his chest exposing the tattoos that covered his arms and hiding the reaper on his back.

"Well aren't you a sight for soar eyes" he winked as he once again flashed me that wide grin.

"Long time no see Juan Carlos" I said with a smirk as I pushed the elevator button. A moment later the large elevator doors slid open, without a word he slipped inside the small empty space with me. We rode for another moment in complete silence before he turned and looked at me.

"You never answered my calls well I was gone"

"I know I'm sorry about that. I was confused and trying to focus on Tristen. Im sorry Juice" I said with a sigh. I wanted to be honest with him, wanted to tell him that I was afraid the more I talked to him the more I would fall for him. I wanted to tell him I liked him, I wanted to tell him I could love him. I wanted to tell him I couldn't love a son.

I kept my mouth shut as the elevator doors opened and I stepped inside the hallway. I smiled as he followed behind me.

"I get it, just would have been nice to hear your voice. I feel like I was stuck in a truck for days" he muttered as he ran his hand along the back of his neck.

"That must have been fun. None of the boys came with you?" I asked as we made the short walk to my room.

"No, some girl named Cherry hitched a ride with me back from Nevada" he mentioned as he stepped inside the room, the door shutting behind him.

I was shocked. When I was with Opie as good as he treated me most of the time he tended to lie to me or not tell me most details. He never told me anything that happened with SAMCRO and anything that happened well out runs and I was always fine with that. With Juice he didn't seem to hide anything, a thought that was refreshing.

"Cherry, sounds nice. Who is she?" I hated myself for asking, but the part of me that was falling for Juice needed to know.

"Some girl from Nevada, she slept with Clay. All she would tell me was she needed to get to Charming so I didn't think it would be a big deal. Clay was pretty pissed off when she got out of the truck" he muttered as he sat on the nearby bed.

"I bet he was. He has to deal with Gemma" I called over my shoulder as I slipped my jacket off and tossed it on a chair.

Before Juice had a chance to respond I heard my phone vibrating. I quickly dug through my purse until I spotted the iphone. I pulled it out just as the screen turned on showing a new text from Tara. "Heads up saw your new boyfriend today on the ground in hand cuffs" was all it said.

I sighed out loud as I quickly shoved the phone back into the purse. "How was your day?" I asked him trying to play it cool and not act like I didn't receive the surprising text.

Tara's text was a sharp reminder of what I was getting into here. I didn't plan on falling for someone when I came back to Charming especially a sons. I wanted a normal life not a guy who was handsome, charming, funny, and hand cuffed during the day.

"Umm not the best day" he said standing from the bed. He effortlessly wrapped one arm around my waist and pulled me closer to him.

"Can I be honest with you?" he asked with that god damn grin. That grin that seemed to give me butterfly's in my stomach.

I silently nodded as I ran my free hand along his cheek that barley showed the sign of the dark bruise he had only days before.

"We were raided today. It wasn't a big deal. It was a bullshit nothing stuck I just spent more time then I would like on the ground in hand cuffs" he said with a wink.

I couldn't help but smile. I hated that I was relieved he was honest with me, I wanted to use his admission as another reason why I shouldn't be falling for him but he was making this more difficult by each moment.

"Oh really, that sounds like an interesting day" I wanted to kiss him but once again before I could do anything his phone went off.

Through the phone I could hear the heavy accent of the Scottish son. Juice mumbled something into the phone before shoving it back into his pocket.

"I'm so sorry babe. I have to go. Club business" he mumbled before he quickly touched his lips to mine. He pulled away for a moment as our eyes locked together. I expected him to say something but he quickly crushed his lips against mine. He grabbed my hips as he pulled me against him. I wrapped my arms around his neck let my hands run along the smooth touch of his skin and the stubble of his closely shaved mohawk.

When he pulled away I felt myself catch my breath. "I will call you tomorrow. This time I expect an answer" he said with a wink before kissing me quickly again.

I watched him pull open the door and head back into the hotel hallway. Once he was out of sight I quickly grabbed the handle and yanked it open. I ran out into the hallway and spotted him just as he was about to get on the elevator.

"Juice" I called out hoping to get his attention.

I watched him spin around and grin at me. "Juice, would you want me to move to Charming?" I called out for the first time bringing it to his attention that my visit was supposed to be temporary.

He stopped for a moment and smirked. "I was dreading the day when you would say you were headed back home. Let me know if you need help moving" he called out before stepping out of sight and into the elevator.


	9. Everything I Shouldn't Be Thinking About

It had been three days since I had last seen Juice. He had been busy with SAMCRO and I had been spending my days walking around town searching for a job or apartment to rent. I couldn't help but notice the local barber shops window was smashed as I walked by. I had heard from around town Jax had been involved which was not so surprising. I smiled when I felt my phone vibrating in my pocket. Juice hadn't been to busy to send me a few texts through out the day.

"I'm out with half sack towing cars. Hope I run into you" was all the text said. I was shocked he took the time to text me. When I hated dated previous guys the most texts I received were late night booty calls or dick pictures. I liked that Juice checked in, I liked that he made a point to tell me he was going to be around and I really liked the idea of potentially running into him well I was out and about.

I quickly typed out a have a good day text before shoving the phone back into my purse silently reminding myself to get back to looking for a job. I had been so distracted by Juice's text I didn't even see Opie coming towards me until I looked up.

"Shit" I muttered trying to quickly think of some way I could escape what was coming.

"Holly, hey" he said in his deep voice that used to give me goose bumps.

"Opie" I said as I continued walking hoping he would drop any attempt at conversation.

"Holly stop" he called out.

I quickly spun around on my heels, now facing the man who towered over me. "Why Op? Do you not think we've talked enough" I harshly whispered at him trying to avoid another public scene like the one at the club house a few days before.

"Because Holly your going to leave town any day now. It's been years since you left, years since I've tried to beg you to let me right my wrongs. Now when your back in town your going to leave again and your going to remember me as not only the guy who cheated on you but now the guy who got drunk got a bit to mouthy and fought with your new boyfriend. I don't want that Hol, just give me a chance to talk to you. I've changed" he blurted out so fast I barley had time to process what he had admitted.

"He's not my boyfriend" I spit out hating the words as soon as they left my mouth. I couldn't believe I had just sounded like a thirteen year old girl. I liked Juice there was nothing wrong for casually seeing him and I sure as hell did not need to justify him to Opie Winston.

"Whatever you guys are I'm sorry"

"Sorry for what Opie. Sorry for what happened with us. Sorry for the bruise you left on my wrist after you grabbed me the other night or sorry for fighting with Juice" I almost yelled at him. I took a moment and forced myself to breath.

"Sorry for it all" was all he could manage to say.

"I'm sorry to" I muttered as I turned back around and walked away from him this time not stopping even for his calls.

It took me more then an hour to shake of my interaction with Opie. I tried to focus on job hunting, tried to look for an apartment but everything in that god damn town reminded me of Opie and our past together. I was more then relieved to reach the coffee shop. I bounded inside the small cafe, and sighed seeing the large line up of the most likely mid day lunch rush. I was instantly calmed when I looked through the coffee shops old beat up blinds to spot a familiar tattooed covered biker.

I bounded out of the shop, happy to leave the line up behind to get at lest a few minutes with Juice before he needed to return back to work.

I watched him for a moment, not being able to hide the smile that crossed my face. I smirked seeing him leaning against the Teller Morrow tow truck. He had sun glasses on covering his dark brown eyes, wearing a white t shirt his cut most likely in the saddle bag of his bike back at the shop.

Once again I felt butterfly's as he looked up, our eyes locking. He shot me that famous grin and I was instantly brought back to feeling like a teenager crushing on the bad boy at school. I was silently cursing myself for dressing in jeans, running shoes and a casual sweater which didn't seem to give me the figure flattering look I would rather be in at the moment. I took a moment before I slowly made my way over to him.

"Hey you" was all he needed to say to bring all the stress from earlier on in the day was wiped away.

"What are you doing out here all alone?" I asked as I stood in front of him.

"Half Sack ditched me" he admitted wrapping his arm around my waist as he pulled me closer to him.

"He ditched you. How did that happen?" I asked feeling the touch of his rings against my skin as his hands gripped my hips sliding under my sweater.

"He stole an ambulance" he smirked.

"What? Why would any one steal an ambulance?"

"I have no idea. He was here one minute the next he was taking off down the street. Now I've gotta bring this piece of shit back to the garage" he smirked.

"I wont keep you then. I should probably get back to looking for a job anyways"

"Hol, why don't you just go work for your dad. He employees half of Charming he's gotta be able to give you a job to?"

"My family was part of the reason I left Juice. I cant imagine working in the same building with him everyday. I've already been getting messages all morning from Tristen saying he is in a mood because one of his diesel tankers was stolen"

"Alright just think about it. I used to wish I had family who could help me out, now that I'm with SAMCRO I do" he said with another smile as he gripped my hips again and pulled me into another kiss before slowly pulling back.

"I'm sorry gorgeous I gotta get back. I gotta save Half Sack before the guys see what he's bringing back. I'll call you later" he softly said kissing me again before he dropped the grip on my waist.

"I'll see you later" was all I could manage to say as I stepped back on the side walk and watched him head to the drivers side.

"Talk to your dad Hol" he called over his shoulder because sliding into the drivers seat and shutting the door behind him. I stood there for another moment knowing he was right. I had applied everywhere and no where seemed to be hiring maybe I should go to the one person who would hire me without any question.

Half an hour later I was standing in front of my dads desk well I listened to him mumbling something into the phone. I quietly walked around the large office I had used to play in when I was a little girl. It had seemed like ages ago when Tristen and I had posed for the family shots that sat on the shelves near his desk. I was focused on one of my parents on their wedding day where they were starring into each others eyes smiling when I heard my dad call out my name.

"Holly is everything okay? Is Tristen okay?" he asked seeming concerned that I was standing in his office.

"Dad everything is fine. Tristen is at school. I'm actually here to talk to you about something" I blurted out trying to figure out the best way to approach my dad about a potential job.

"What is it?"

"I'm moving back to Charming dad at lest for a few months. I've spent the last two days looking for a job but it's hard out there" I spit out hoping the more direct I was the more he would appreciate what I was asking.

"Wow Holly that's great. Have you told your mom yet?"

"No, I want to make sure I have an apartment and a job before I get her hopes up"

"Well Holly, you know you can work here there's a few positions open. I just need to make a deal with you first" he said his face growing serious.

"What kind of deal?"

"I want to meet him Holly" was all he said.

I felt my stomach drop. "Meet who dad?" I softly asked hoping he wasnt talking about Juice.

"The guy you've been seeing Holly. I know he is in SAMCRO. I want to meet him"

"Dad, I'm not seeing anyone"

"Don't lie to me Holly. This is a small town it all gets back to me" he bluntly said.

"Thanks for nothing" I called out over my shoulder as I spun on my heel to turn and leave the room. I didn't know what was happening with me and Juice. I knew I liked him and planned on seeing him more but I was not about to scare him off by meeting my parents.

"Whenever you need a job it's here Holly. I just want to meet him first. Bring him by the house tomorrow night at seven for dinner and you can start work the next morning" he called out as I shut the door behind me.


End file.
